WELCOME TO WONDERSPACE: HERE YOU'LL READ REAL SITUATIONS. BUT SOME THINGS WERE MODIFIED BY THE MADHATTER. REALITY AND DREAMS ARE MIXED.FOLLOW THE WHITE RABBIT KNOWING THAT PLACES AND TIME REFERENCES ARE NOT REAL. MENTION OF REAL PEOPLE NAMES IS FORBIDDEN BY THE QUEEN OF HEARTS. ALL COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL, AND REFERENCES TO THEM SHOWN ON THIS BLOG ARE THERE FOR FUN AND OR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES SO EAT AND DRINK THEM WITH CAUTION.
WARNING! THIS SITE HAS COOKIES SO BY READING IT YOU AGREE ABOUT THAT!
"WELL, FIRST OF ALL I'VE BEEN SENDING MATERIAL AND APPLIES FOR SOME GALLERIES AND... WELL. I DON'T REMEMBER THEM ALL, BUT YOU GET FEEDBACK SO I CAN RETRIEVE THAT DATA. AND I DON'T REMEMBER VERY WELL, BUT..."
"BUT WHAT??? YOU ARE SO EXCITED!!!"
"YES! LOOK. I DON'T REMEMBER VERY WELL, I DID NOT MEMORIZE ALL THE NAMES OF THE GALLERIES I'VE BEEN APPLYING FOR. BUT THE MAIL WAS LIKE...
DEAR ANDRIEL TABRAX. WE THINK YOU MISTOOK AND YOU TOLD US YOU DID NOT WANT TO APPLY FOR US ANYMORE.
SO AS WE THINK THIS IS A MISTAKE, WE WOULD LIKE TO KNOW IF YOU ARE SURE ABOUT THIS OR NOT.
PLEASE CONTACT BACK.
...AND I CANNOT BELIEVE IT"
"FEELS GOOD, EH, CUB!"
"YEEEEAAAAAH!!! AWEEEESOOOOMEEEE!!!! IT WAS LIKE... PLEASE!!! RECONSIDER!!! WE WANT YOUR WORK!!!!!! I FEEL LIKE... SO HAPPY I COULD DIE!!!"
"YEP!"
"IT WAS """ARE YOU SUUUUUREEE????""" AWESOME, OUTSTANDING, INCREDIBLE!!!"
"SO WHAT YOU'LL DO"
"I'LL THINK ABOUT IT BUT MY ANSWER IS YES"
"HOW'S THAT?"
"IT'S JUST THAT MAIL. I CANNOT SAY NO. BUT I NEED TO KNOW MORE ABOUT THE GALLERY AND OTHER STUFF. SO ONE STEP AT A TIME"
"ONE STEP AT A TIME??? HEY. SALLAH BAJICEK (I WROTE THAT RIGHT? o.O) SAID THAT!"
"WELL. I CALLED THE BANK AND THEY TOLD ME THEY DID NOT KNOW THE CODE NUMBER I WAS ASKING AND IF THEY KNEW, THEY COULDN'T TELL ME ON THE PHONE, SO I INSISTED I WANTED IT TO HAVE PAYPAL TO BE ABLE TO PAY IN THE NET. SO I WAS TOLD "DON'T HANG THE PHONE, WE WILL TRANSFERE THE CALL TO THE INTERNET ISSUES LINE" AND AS I WAS WAITING LISTENING TO AWFUL MUSIC I TOLD MYSELF "OH HOW I HATE THE FUCKING PHONE!!! IT'S THE WORST INVENTION OF HISTORY!!!!"
"MAYBE THE CODE HAS ANOTHER NAME IN CHILE..."
"I TOLD THAT TO THE GUY OF THE INTERNET ISSUES LINE, AND HE TOLD ME I COULD NOT PUT MY ACCOUNT IN PAYPAL. SO I TOLD HIM THAT I PREFFERED BE TOLD THAT BY PAYPAL AND NOT HIM. AND HE TALKED AND TALKED. AND I GOT IT. NOBODY KNEW WHAT CODE I WAS TALKING ABOUT, SO WHEN HE TOLD ME TO CALL BACK TO THE FIRST NUMBER I CALLED, I TOLD THE GUY "LISTEN, FRIEND. YOU ARE SUPPOSSED TO KNOW WHAT I'M ASKING. YOU'RE JOKING???" THEN HE INSISTED IT WAS IMPOSSIBLE AND IMPOSSIBLE AND IMPOSSIBLE FOR ME TO GET PAYPAL ACCESS. SO I TOLD HIM "OH YES?! OH... I DID NOT KNOW! OH I FEEL SO SORRY FOR WASTING YOUR TIME. WELL, THANKS ANYWAY, GOODBYE!!!" "
"SO HOW YOU HAVE PAYPAL NOW???"
"LOOK. I MEDITATED... NO, DON'T LAUGH. THIS IS SERIOUS. MIKE! ...WELL SO I WAS MEDITATING AND I TRIED TO FIND MY INNER CENTER OF PEACE, THE CORE OF MY HEART. AND WHEN I DID... I THOUGHT IN ONE OF MY MENTORS... I LEARNED THE MENTORS THING IN A COACHING BOOK I READ... SO I ASKED MYSELF IN THIS INNER SPACE OF MY HEART "WHAT WOULD ANGELINA JOLIE DO???"
"SO... WHAT YOU DID???"
"USED A COMPUTER" HE SAID SHOULDERS UP.
"SO YOU BECAME ZERO COOL???"
"EH... KINDA. LOOK I JUST GOOGLED AND I FOUND A YOUTUBE TUTORIAL TO GET PAYPAL ACCESS WITH MY BANK ACCOUNT. SO I FOLLOWED THE INSTRUCTIONS AND... TA-DAAAN!!!"
"SOUNDS EASY"
"WELL, IN CHILE THERE'S A LOT OF THINGS YOU CANNOT DO, SO YOU HAVE TO FIND A WAY. AN ALTERNATIVE WAY. LIKE A TRICK OR SOMETHING. IT IS A CHILEAN HISTORIC THING. FOR EXAMPLE IN THE PACIFIC WAR, A SMALL CHILEAN SHIP MADE A PERUBIAN WAY LARGER SHIP FOLLOW IT. SO THE SMALLER SHIP GOT NEAR THE BEACH, BUT THE LARGER SHIP GOT STUCK IN THE SAND, THEN THE SMALLER CHILEAN SHIP WENT BACK AND THREW ALL ITS AMO, WINNING THE BATLLE. YOU SEE???"
"HOW YOU KNOW THAT???"
"SCHOOL???"
"THAT PRIVATE SCHOOL YOU WENT TO... SOUNDS LIKE COLLEGE TO ME"
"AT GYM! MIKE... AT GYM... DON'T MAKE ME SAY IT 3 TIMES, PLEASE SUGAR?"
"I DON'T UNDERSTAND. EXPLAIN PLEASE???" -.-'
"LOOK" SAID THE CUB "IT WAS LIKE A YEAR AGO. AND I TOLD YOU THIS GUY SEEMED TO HAVE A FASCINATION WITH ME AND YOU GOT ANGRY AND I TOLD YOU THAT I WOULD TALK TO HIM AND NOTHING WOULD HAPPEN, THAT!!!"
"SOUNDS SO HUMBLE WHEN YOU SAY "I KNOW NOTHING'S GONNA HAPPEN". YOU'RE COCKY OR WHAT???"
"IT'S NOT IT. I JUST KNOW 10.000 DATING RULES, SO BY WHAT I SEE AND HEAR, I KNOW WHEN NOTHING'S GONNA HAPPEN, SO I DON'T WASTE TIME. THAT'S ALL. AND YOU DID NOT BELIEVE ME AND I TOLD YOU WE COULD BET MONEY AND YOU SAID "GO AHEAD!!! TALK TO THE GUY!!!" AND I INSISTED NOTHING WOULD HAPPEN!!! YOU GOT IT ALL AROUND, SERIOUSLY"
"WHAT????!!!!" O.o! THIS GUY'S GONNA MAKE ME GET BALD!!!
"LOOK. IT TOOK ME LIKE TWO WEEKS TO DECIDE I WOULD TALK TO HIM. THE THING IS, THE GUY WAS GOOD LOOKING AND A LITTLE BIT ABOVE GOOD LOOKING. I MEAN... IS, HE'S NOT DEAD..."
"YOU CUB!!!"
"LOOK, TAKE IT EASY. IT WAS LIKE THIS... I WAS MAKING MY GYM ROUTINE IN A CORNER OF THE GYM AND THIS GUY WAS GOOD LOOKING SO, LET'S SAY I LOOKED AT HIM ONCE OR TWICE. BUT HE NEVER GOES THE SAME DAYS OF THE WEEK OR AT THE SAME TIME. THAT'S ANOTHER REASON TO REALIZE NOTHING WOULD HAPPEN, AS I DID NOT KNOW IF I WOULD EVER SEE HIM AGAIN!!!"
"YEAH, KEEP TALKIN' "
"WELL. I WAS AT THE CORNER OF THE GYM, AND THEN HE CAME ALL OF A SUDDEN WITH A LEEVELESS SHIRT. AND STARTED LIFTING WEIGHS FOR BICEPS... AT MY SIDE. THIS MEANS "INSIDE MY PERSONAL SPACE" SO I THOUGHT "WHAT THE HELL??? AND SOMETIMES HE WOULD LOOK AT ME AT SMILE, AND WINK. AND THEN HE STARTED LOOKING AT HIMSELF AND ME WHEN HE WAS LOOKING AT HIS SHAPED BODY AND HE WOULD SHOW HIS ARMPITS AND SMILE AND... I WAS WONDERING IF HE WAS OR NOT I.E...
...SO LOOKING AT HIS BEHAVIOUR I THOUGHT "YEEEAH. HE'S HIIIIGH!!!!". THEN HE MADE A CELL-PHONE CALL, AND BY THE WAY HE WAS TALKING I REALIZED HE WAS A ZERO IN THE KINSEY SCALE"
"REALLY??? HOW YOU KNEW THAT?"
"HE SAID "BEER" TOO MANY TIMES. SO AFTER TWO WEEKS I DECIDED TO TALK TO HIM, KNOWING NOTHING WOULD HAPPEN. ANYWAY ANYTIME HE GOES TO THE GYM AND I AM THERE, HE LOOKS AT ME WITH WILLING EYES. BUT WHEN I TALKED TO HIM, I KNEW NOTHING WOULD HAPPEN SO I WAS WONDERING HOW TO DO IT WITHOUT "EXPOSING HIM" YOU KNOW? SO THERE'S A SPACE SURROUNDED BY GLASS, WITH A GLASS DOOR, WHERE THEY MAKE AEROBIC EXERCISES. BUT MOST OF THE PEOPLE WHO GO TO THAT GYM ARE MEN, THIS MEANS THAT AEROBICS SPACE IS HARDLY EVER USED. SO HE WENT IN AND STARTED TO MAKE ABS WORK. AND I THOUGHT "WHY NOT?" SO I WENT INSIDE AND SUDDENLY I FELT AWKWARD..."
"YOU??? HA, GOOD JOKE CUB!!! GOOD JOKE!"
"AND I WAS LIKE "I TALK TO HIM, NOT, I'M INSIDE THE GLASS ROOM HE'S ALONE HE SAW ME GET IN, I'LL JUST ASK HIM" I THOUGH ALL THIS IN A FRACTION OF SECOND. AND I GOT NEAR HIM AND ASKED HIM "ARE YOU GAY?" HE SMILED AND GIGGLED AND SAID "NOPE", AND I WAS ABOUT TO LEAVE AND I MADE ANOTHER QUESTION "AND BI?", HE SAID "NOPE" HE SMILED AGAIN AND GIGGLED MORE. SO I WENT OUT THE GLASS AEROBIC ROOM AND STARTED WORKING OUT NEAR THE GLASS ROOM FOR IF THE GUY WANTED TO TALK BACK. AND YOU KNOW WHAT???"
"NOTHING HAPPENNED!!!!"
"YES! WE SHOULD HAVE BET MONEY. ANYWAY."
"WHAT HAPPENNED LATER"
"WELL, I'VE SEEN HIM SOMETIMES AND I'VE HAD THE FUNNY IDEA OF TELLING HIM "HI, HOW ARE YOU????" WINKING AND ALL, BUT THEN I THINK AGAIN AND SAY "THAT IS JUST NOT COOL" BUT HE KEEPS LOOKING AT ME. ANYWAY..."
"YEAH YOU MALE POISON IVY..."
"AND THERE'S OTHER STORY"
"LET ME GUESS" I SAID "AT GYM TOO???"
"YES!!! AND YOU WON IN JEOPARDY!!!!"
"NOT FUNNY CUB!!!"
"NO, IT WAS NOT FUNNY"
"WHAT???"
"WELL THIS GUY I DID NOT KNOW HE EXISTED. AND AT GYM ONE DAY THIS GUY APPROACHED, BUT STAYED LIKE TWO METERS AWAY FROM ME, I MEAN, OUTSIDE MY PERSONAL SPACE (???) AND HE SAID "HOW'S YOUR ROUTINE? FINE? YOU LIKE WORKING OUT???" HE WAS SMILING. AND HE DIDN'T SAY DABADADDBABDDA IN THE MIDDLE SO I STARTED WONDERING IF HE WAS OR NOT "I.E.". MICHAEL LERKOFF... I GOT SO SCARED!!! AND THEN I SAID "FINE... WHY YOU ASK?" WITH A SURPRISED, CONFUSED, SCARED AND FULLY LACK OF TRUST LOOK. AND HE SAID SMILING AGAIN "NO, NOTHING. I JUST ASK, SO I'LL KNOW..." AND HE DID NOT SAY DDADBDBBDADADA IN THE MIDDLE AGAIN. SO I GOT TO THE CONCLUSION THAT... YES!!! HE WAS A SERIAL KILLER!"
"HAHAHAHAHA... AND THEN???"
"I EXAMINED HIS BEHAVIOUR FOR ONE DAY. AND I REALIZED HE WAS JUST A DUMBASS. AND I GOT TO THE CONCLUSION HE WAS NOT INTIMIDATED BY ME CAUSE HE DID NOT SEE THE REASONS TO BE INTIMIDATED."
"WHAAAAT????!!!!"
"THAT STUPID HE WAS. AND IF HE DID NOT SEE THE REASONS TO BE INTIMIDATED, BETTER STAY AWAY FROM HIM. YOU KNOW? THEN SOME TIME PASSED AND HE WAS WITH SOME FRIENDS AND THEY PUT THE SMARTPHONE WITH REGAETTON AND HE AND HIS FRIENDS STARTED TO DANCE LIKE DUMBASSES MAKING A STUPID CHOREOGRAPHY, MORE STUPID THAN THE GANGNAM STYLE, SO I SAID. NOPE. NEVER. BUT... I'LL JOKE WITH THE GUY. SO IF I SAW HIM I SMILED AND RAISED MY EYEBROWS AND WOULD SAY "HI, HOW ARE YOU???" TO JOKE AND GIVE HIM FALSE EXPECTATIONS. AND ONE DAY I WAS USING A MACHINE THAT IS DIFFICULT TO CONTROL WHEN THE WHEIGH DISKS FALL. SO IT SOUNDED, BUT I DID NOT HEAR AS I WAS LISTENING TO MY WALKMAN WITH THE EARPHONES ON. AND HE CAME AND SAID SOMETHING IN ANGRY TONE TO ME. AND I TOOK OUT ONE EARPHONE AND ASKED "WHAT YOU SAID???" CAUSE I DID NOT LISTEN. AND HE REALIZED HE HAD JUST PUT THE FOOT AND GAVE ME A SHORT AND LAME EXPLANATION TO TRY TO FIX WHAT HE COULDN'T. SO HE SAID IN A BAD EFFORT TO SOUND HUMBLE "NOOO, YOU KNOW??? IT'S JUST YOU LET THE WEIGHS FALL AND... WHEN THE DISKS FALL THEY MAKE SOUND AND THE MACHINE CAN... GLUP... GET BROKEN" SO I SAID "AH, ALRIGHT". NOW I DON'T EVEN LOOK AT HIM, AND HE PLAINLY ABOIDS ME BUT WHEN HE LOOKS AT ME I SEE IN HIS EYES HE'S THINKING "I SCREWED IT UP!!!". I NEVER WAS INTERESTED IN HIM, HE SCARED ME. THAT'S THE END OF THE STORY"
"LOOK. IT IS BETTER TO BUY ON LINE WITH A DEBIT CARD, SO HACKERS WON'T STEAL ALL YOUR "CREDIT" YOU KNOW? SO THE DEBIT CARDS ALLOW YOU TO PUT IN THERE THE MONEY YOU ARE GONNA USE ON LINE AND... TA DAAAN!!! NEO WON'T STEAL YOU!!! THAT'S IT"
"YOU COULD BUY ONE..." I SAID HONESTLY.
"IN CHILE??? NOPE. IMPOSSIBLE. THEY DON'T EXIST. NOT VISA OR MASTERCARD AT LEAST OR AMERICAN EXPRESS, THE STANDARD CARDS TO BUY IN THE NET. I THINK, IF THEY EXIST, YOU HAVE TO ASK FOR ONE, BUT THEY HAVE CHARGES AND YOU HAVE TO PAY FOR HAVING IT LIKE... EACH THREE MONTHS IF IT'S NOT MONTHLY, NOPE, I DON'T WANNA DO THAT"
"EXPLAIN ME AGAIN WHY YOU DON'T HAVE A CREDIT CARD"
"SIMPLY. THERE'S A STORE THREE BLOCKS FROM MY HOME WHERE I BUY EXPRESS DIET COKE FOR A PENNY, NOT A DOLLAR FOR A CAN. NORMALLY THEY HAVE DIET EXPRESS COKE IN BOTTLE, HARDLY EVER THEY DON'T, BUY THERE'S LIKE TEN STORES NEAR WHERE I CAN BUY ONE, SO IN THAT CASE I HAVE TO WALK A LITTLE FURTHER"
"WHY YOU'RE TELLING ME THIS???"
"WHERE I GO NORMALLY, THE STORE OWNER KNOWS ME, SO IF I DON'T HAVE THE PENNY IN MY POCKET, THAT HAPPENS KINDA... NEVER, BUT HE TELLS ME I CAN PAY LATER, AS I GO VERY OFTEN. YOU KNOW AS I DON'T DRINK IS LIKE GOING TO A BAR FOR ME... YES!!! BUT WHEN I OWE HIM THE PENNY I DON'T LIKE THE FEELING. IT IS AWFUL!!! A PENNY, MIKE, YOU THINK I WANT TO HAVE A "CREDIT CARD"? I DON'T THINK SO. THE BOURGEOIS PEOPLE HATE ME FOR THAT, CAUSE I PAY CASH, ANYWAY"
"SO HOW YOU'RE GONNA PAY ON LINE???"
"WITH PAYPAL. MY ACCOUNT HAS A CARD THAT CAN BE USED AS DEBIT AND TO PAY ON LINE IN CHILE (NOT THE REST OF THE WORLD) AND TO RETRIEVE MONEY FROM A CASH MACHINE, YOU CAN USE IT TO PAY THE BUS OR THE SUBWAY TOO, BAD IDEA SO YOU'LL GET YOUR BANK CARD STOLEN IN A BRIEF, AND ALSO IT CAN BE USED TO OPEN DOORS. SOME DOORS. AND AS A BOOK MARKER."
"OH, I SEE... YOU CUB!!!"
"C'MON, YOU'RE LAUGHING. I KNOW YOU. I KNOW YOU. ANYWAY. FOR PAYPAL I NEED A CODE NUMBER I DON'T KNOW, SO I'LL HAVE TO CALL THE BANK TO KNOW THAT NUMBER. THEN PAYPAL SHOULD APPROVE THE BANK ACCOUNT, AS THE CARD IS USELESS FOR PAYPAL, AND, THAT'S ALL... EASY MONEY!!!"
"WHAT YOU'RE GONNA BUY???"
"CHRISTMAS IS AROUND THE CORNER. I BUY ALL PRESENTS FOR ME AND THE REST OF THE PEOPLE I CARE ABOUT, IN OCTOBER OR NOVEMBER, CAUSE I SEE HOW PEOPLE GO CRAZY IN DECEMBER CAUSE EVERYTHING IS OUT OF STOCK. AND THEY RUN BUYING ALL PRESENTS MAKING OF CHRISTMAS A NIGHTMARE SIMILAR TO THE GIRLS WHO CELEBRATE THEIR 15'S, ANYWAY..."
"WELL, THAT'S SMART..."
"YEP"
··················FIRE OF MY LOOOOINSSSS!!!·············
"NNNNOPE!!!" ANSWERED THE CUB "AT CATHOLIC COLLEGE THERE WAS A COMMON SCHEDULE AND YOU COULD CHOOSE A MENTION IN YEAR 3. AND THE MENTIONS WERE... GRAPHIC, INDUSTRIAL, SPACE, AND A LOT OTHER ONES. GUESS THERE WAS A FASHION MENTION BUT IT WAS NO CLEAR AS NOBODY TOOK THAT MENTION, SO IT WAS JUST RUMORED. MAYBE THAT'S WHY I ONLY KNOW 5 FABRICS..."
"AH.. WELL" O.o' "BUT YOU WERE THERE 5 SEMESTERS..."
"YES BUT I RUINED MY SCORES IN THE ATELIER COURSE IN SEMESTER 4, SO IN SEMESTER 5 I STILL WAS IN THE COMMON SCHEDULE"
"YOU RUINED... WHAT?"
"SIMPLE, MIKE. THE TEACHERS WOULD TELL US "WE WANT YOU GUYS TO DO ""THIS"" " SO EVERYONE WOULD DO ""THIS"" AND WHEN THE TEACHERS SAW OUR WORKS, THEY WERE MAD AT US AND WOULD TELL US WE WERE MORONS AND DID NOT UNDERSTAND, CAUSE THEY SAID THEY WANTED ""THIS"" BUT THEY MEANT ""THAT"", SO IT WAS LIKE LOTTERY"
"I DON'T GET IT"
"I DON'T EITHER. PLUS THE TEACHERS WOULD USE DESIGN WORDS, BUT THE MEANING OF THE WORDS WERE "ART" WORDS, AND BELIEVE ME WHITE CHOCOLATE, ART AND DESIGN TERMS ARE WAAAAY DIFFERENT"
"SO IT WAS EASY TO RUIN YOUR SCORES"
"YEP. FOR EVERYONE. FOR EXAMPLE AT SOME POINT I REALIZED ABOUT THIS, SO WHEN THEY SAID THEY WANTED A CONCEPTUAL WORK, I WOULD MAKE A CONCEPTUAL WORK FROM THE POINT OF VIEW OF ART, AND NOOOO, JUST THEN, THEY MEANT CONCEPTUAL WORK BUT IN DESIGN TERMS, SO... IN THE END I GOT BORED OF ALL THAT AND LEFT THE SCHOOL. PLUS ALL THE TIME THE TEACHERS WERE SAYING ALL OUR WORKS VALUED MUSHROOM. FUCKING SNOBS!!!"
"YOU DID NOT WANT TO STUDY FASHION DESIGN???"
"NO, FOR THE SAME REASON. PLUS ALL BEST FASHION DESIGNERS DIDN'T STUDY FASHION DESIGN AT COLLEGE. LIKE CHANEL, JEAN PAUL GAULTIER, VERSACE, AMONG OTHERS..."
"REALLY???"
"OF COURSE, THAT'S WHY THEY BECAME SUCH GOOD DESIGNERS, THEY DID NOT STUDY DESIGN!!!"
