NOT THE DOCTOR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

"I CANNOT BELIEVE MY FUCKING EX-COUSIN IS MARRYING IN APRIL!!!"

 

"YES, CUB, WE LOST FIRST SEMESTER"

 

"WHAT THE... FFFFUCK!!!"

 

"WELL ON SECOND THOUGHT WE REALIZED WE DIDN'T WANT OUR FATALITY DAY TO BE MADE IN ONE WEEK. WE CAN WAIT"

 

"YES... I FEEL SOOO RELIEEEEVEED ABOUT THAT"

 

"ME... TOO···O.o"

 

"HOPE IT RAINS THAT FUCKING DAY"

 

"LIKE... NOVEMBER RAIN"

 

"YEAH. OR WORSE. THINKING IF I DON'T HELP THAT... NUN... TO GET INTO MED SCHOOL... HE WOULD BE ALL DAY DRUNK AND PLAYING THE ELCTRIC BASS BY NOW!!!! THAT'S GRATTITUDE!!! FUCKER...!"

 

"LOOK AT THE BRIGHT SIDE. NOW WE HAVE A LOT OF PEOPLE IN STAND BY FOR DEATH LIST FIVE, MAYBE WE'LL KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH THEM AFTER APRIL. AND YOU INVITED A FRIEND AND SAID "I WOULD KILL TO GO!!!", SO SHE GOES WITH HER BOUFRIEND AND... YOU SEE? THERE'S NO RUSH. AND YOUR BROTHER IS NOT INVITED"

 

"YEAH. MY GRANNY, GODMOTHER, HIGH PRIESTESS, SAID I HAD TO FORGIVE HIM. AFTER READING WHAT OSCAR WILDE SAYS ABOUT FORGIVING ENEMIES, IT WAS SO EASY TO DO IT. SO I DID WHAT SHE WANTED. FROM WHEREVER SHE IS, THAT IS ENOUGH AND FOR SURE DOESN'T WANT DARTH VADER IN... THERE. SHE CARES ABOUT ME, WANTS THE BEST FOR ME, NOT THE OPPOSSITE"

 

"AND YOUR GRANDMOTHER??? DOLORES JANE UMBRIDGE???"

 

"INVITED, BUT SHE COMPLAINS ONCE, AND IS OUT OF THE PARTY"

 

"DEAL!!!!"

 

"SO WHEN I'M MOVING TO YOUR PLACE????"

 

"I EXPECT SOON. BUT IF SOMETHING HAPPENS IN BETWEEN.... YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN. SOUNDS GOOD?"

 

"NOT GOOD ENOUGH, BUT GOOD"

 

"WANNA PLAY DOCTOR???"

 

"NOPE"

 

"KUSS MICH OURSON"

 

BEETHOVEN LOOOOVED THE COUNTRY

 

"BEETHOVEN LOOOVED THE COUNTRY"

 

"WELL, I  DON'T. I HATE IT"

 

"CUB, THAT'S WHAT SHROEDER SAYS"

 

"I HAVE A BAD FEELING ABOUT THIS... PLUS, AGAIN. I HATE THE COUNTRY!!!"

 

"JUST RELAX, I'M DRIVING I HAVE ALL UNDER CONTROL"

 

"AS ALWAYS MIKE"

 

"TRUST ME"

 

"???!!!"

 

"ALRIGHT!"

 

"YOU SEE THOSE HOUSES. THINKING THESE PEOPLE LIVE FAR AWAY FROM THE CITY AND ALL THE NOISE AND TRAFFIC JAMS"

 

"AND THEY LACK OF INTERNET, HELL YEAH, THAT'S COOL"

 

"CUB, YOU AGREED TO COME"

 

"MORE LIKE YOU LEFT NO OTHER CHOICE... THIS IS JUST... BORING!!!"

 

"WE ARE LISTENING TO MUSIC AND WE ARE GOING TO THE COUNTRY... WE'LL HAVE A BLAST"

 

"A BLAST... YOUR ASS"

 

"CUB, WHAT'S WRONG WITH THE ATTITUDE???"

 

 

"NOTHING, SUGARPIE, WHITE CHOCOLATE, BLUEBERRY MUFFIN..."

 

"YOU SEE?"

 

"SHIT. I GOT LOST"

 

"TURN RIGHT"

 

"NO, I WON'T"

 

"MICHAEL. TURN RIGHT"

 

"I WILL TURN LEFT"

 

"DON'T MAKE ME TELL YOU LATER "I TOLD YOU SO"

 

"C'MON! I'LL JUST TURN LEFT, THERE'S NOTHING WRONG"

 

"YEAH... MEIN GOT"

 

"YOU DON'T HAVE TO MAKE A BIG DEAL, TAKE IT EASY"

 

"YOU SEE? NO PROBLEM"

 

"OH, YES. MICHAEL"

 

"STOP! CALLING ME MICHAEL"

 

"DON'T MAKE ME"

 

"HEY LOOK, I CAME HERE TO HAVE FUN AND..."

 

 

"MIKE... :S"

 

"ALRIGHT"

 

"NOW WE ARE IN THE WOODS AND WE WILL CONNECT WITH MOTHER NATURE AND ALL THAT HIPPIE STUFF"

 

"MICHAEL???"

 

"O.o"

 

"-.-"

 

"CUB. WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM???"

 

"NO ONE"

 

"YOU'RE SMILING? WHAT YOU'RE NOT TELLING ME??? HEY!"

 

BLAM!!!

 

 

"NOW I HAVE TO CHANGE THE WHEEL. JUST FIVE MINUTES!"

 

"MICHAEL, I TOLD YOU SO"

 

"YES, I WILL CHANGE THE... WHAT YOU SAID???"

 

"MICHAEL, I TOLD YOU SO"

 

"YOU'LL SAY IT THREE TIMES??? HEY, WHAT DID I DO WRONG NOW???"

 

"JUST LOOK OVER THERE, MIKE"

 

"YES? WELL LOOK OVER THERE CUB"

 

"AND OVER THERE AND OVER THERE"

 

"YOU DON'T CARE?"

 

"YOU'RE MAKING A BIG DEAL ABOUT NOTHING"

 

"LOOK, STUPID JOCK. WHY AM I THINKING YOU JUST TOOK THE WRONG TURN AND NOW I HAVE THE STRONG FEELING THAT THE HILLS HAVE EYES???"

 

"WHAT??? WHAT?"

 

"WE ARE NOT ALONE IN THIS PLACE"

 

"I SEE NO ONE"

 

"BUT ME"

 

"YES, BUT YOU"

 

"WHY YOU GET ANGRY IF YOU SCREWED UP AND NOW YOU ARE SCREWED? I TOLD YOU TO TURN RIGHT"

 

"WHY???"

 

"BECAUSE... OF... THOSE PEOPLE OVER THERE"

 

 

"TAKE OUT YOUR HATTORI HANZO STEEL, CUB"

 

"I ALREADY DID. YOU REALLY THINK I NEED TO BE TOLD TO DO SO, TO DO SO???"

 

 

"WELL. I'LL TAKE OUT MINE"

 

 

"I TOLD YOU CUB THIS WOULD BE SO MUCH FUN"

 

"WE CAN TALK ABOUT THAT LATER... THESE GUYS..."

 

"...ARE DEAD ONES" 

ANYTHING THAT MAY DELAY YOU MIGHT JUST SAVE YOU

ABOUT X-MEN III AND THE STUPID "CURE"



 

"CUB THAT STUPID "CURE" THING IS JUST... SCARY..."

 

"YOU THINK? YEAH, AS A FANTASY"

 

"???"

 

"OH NO... NO, I WON'T!"

 

"WOULD YOU EXPLAIN ME PLEASE?"

 

"HOW CAN YOU MAKE A KIND QUESTION SOUND SO CREEPY???"

 

"JUST TALK"

 

"ALRIGHT... LOOK... THIS IS... SCIENCE!!!"

 

SO WE START WITH DNA

USUALLY DNA IS SHOWN LIKE THIS

TO MAKE IT MORE SIMPLE TO UNDERSTAND

THE REAL SHAPE IS ANYTHING BUT HARMONIOUS

 

THEN WHEN WE SEE DNA SEQUENCES LOOK LIKE THIS

 

AND THESE ARE SOME GENES

 

A GENE IS A DNA SEQUENCE THAT WORKS

FOR "SOMETHING"

SCIENCE IS VERY CLUELESS ABOUT DNA

I'LL EXPLAIN

 

NOW IF YOU SEE THE SEQUENCE OF PERSON 1 IS

AAATTT

 

BUT THE REAL SEQUENCE HAS TWO PARTS, LIKE WE SEE HERE

THIS IMAGE IS NOT TOO ACCURATE

SO FOR

AAATTT

BY DEDUCTION THE OTHER PART IS

TTTAAA 

 

BY CONVENTION BIOLOGY SIMPLIFIED THE CODES SO YOU DON'T HAVE TO LEARN TWO LINES OF DATA, AS "A" LINKS WITH "T" AND "G" LINKS WITH "C"

 

THEN ALL THE GENES TOGETHER FORM THE GENOME

 

BUT

THE INTERACTION BETWEEN GENOME AND ENVIRONMENT

GIVE THE RESULT OF "WHAT WE SEE" IN ALL LIVING FORMS.

 

THAT'S WHY SOME PLANTS SURVIVE IN THE DESERT BUT DIE IN THE ARCTIC

 

NOW. BETWEEN GENES THERE ARE SPACES

BIOLOGY SUPPOSSES THAT THOSE SPACES WEREN'T THERE

BUT LONG TIME AGO SOME KIND OF "ACCIDENT" HAPPENNED

AND THE SPACES APPEARED

THERE ARE LOTS OF CRAZY THEORIES IN BIOLOGY TO EXPLAIN THIS

SO HERE THE COLOR BARS ARE THE GENES AND THE LINES ARE THE SPACES

THESE SPACES ARE CALLED "JUNK DNA"

 

NOW THE HUMAN GENOME WAS DECODED

 

WHAT FOR?

WE'LL KNOW IN THE FUTURE

 

BECAUSE GENOME INTERACTS WITH ENVIRONMENT TO GIVE A VISIBLE RESULT

 

AND GENES INTERACT BETWEEEN THEM

 

AND JUNK DNA INTERACTS WITH ALL GENES IN A WAY NOBODY CAN EXPLAIN YET

 

AND THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN PEOPLE DNA IS LIKE A 0,0001%

THAT PERCENT, MAKES EACH OTHER DIFFERENT

 

"SO MIKE, IT IS ABSURD THE IDEA TO SUPPRESS "ONE" GENE TO "CURE" ALL MUTANTS. PLUS WHAT WE THINK WE KNOW IS THAT IN KINSEY SCALE THE NUMBERS ZERO AND SIX ARE STEREOTYPES AND REAL PEOPLE EXIST BETWEEN THE NUMBERS ONE AND FIVE"

 

 

"MIKE, IF WE ARE ALL MUTANTS AFTER ALL"

 

"WHAT DO YOU KNOW ABOUT GENE THERAPIES???"

 

"THAT ARE VERY DANGEROUS AND USUALLY PEOPLE DIE WITH THOSE EXPERIMENTS. YOU CANNOT CONTROL SOMETHING YOU JUST DON'T KNOW HOW IT WORKS. AND PLAYING WITH GENES IS... ANTINATURAL... I SAY BECAUSE NOBODY KNOWS THE CONSEQUENCES"

 

 

"I MEAN IF SOMETHING LIKE A STUPID CURE FOR "MUTANTS" WAS MADE... BETTER NOT TAKE IT. WHAT WOULD HAPPEN TO A PERSON'S BODY? OR IF THEY BREED???"

 

 

"IT'S NOT ONLY IMPOSSIBLE. A "CURE" FOR "MUTANTS" WOULD BE LIKE A POISON OR SOMETHING. WHO'S GONNA TAKE THAT???"

 

"OH, NOW I FEEL BETTER... YOU LEARN THAT???"

 

"AT COLLEGE"

 

"OH. I SEE"

 

"KUSS MICH"

 

PHONE CALL FROM FRANCE

 

 

"SO THE LEADER OF THE GROUP THEATER TELEPHONED YOU"

 

 

 

"YES... HE DID. WELL, THE FIRS THING HE SAID IS THAT I WAS AN AWESOME THEATER PLAY WRITER, THAT THE PLAY WAS OUTSTANDING, FUTURISTIC AND EVEN AVANT-GARDISTE. AND I TOLD HIM "REALLY? YOU THINK? WELL, GOOD YOU LIKED IT"

 

"YOU KNOW IT'S A GOOD PLAY, CUB!"

 

"I WAS PLAYING HUMBLE!!! ANYWAY. SO HE ASKED ME WHY I DID NOT WANT TO MAKE IT"

 

"AND?"

 

"I TOLD HIM "YOU KNOW, THE DIRECTOR IS SO BOSSY AND..." AND HE TOLD ME "WHICH DIRECTOR???" SO IT TOOK US A FEW MINUTES TO REALIZE I WAS TALKING ABOUT WHAT WAS REALLY HAPPENNING WITH THE THEATER GROUP IN CHILE AND HE WAS TALKING ABOUT WHAT HE SUPPOSSED WAS HAPPENNING, YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?"

 

"HUM. YES, YOU SAID IT WAS STRANGE HOW THE CHILEAN GROUP WAS WORKING AS YOU KNEW HOW THE GUY IN FRANCE WORKS"

 

"YES, BUT I THOUGHT IT WAS LIKE THAT, CAUSE EVERYTIME I MADE SUGGESTIONS I WAS TOLD "WE HAVE OUR WORK SYSTEM, DON'T MEDDLE IN". YOU KNOW IT WAS LIKE ALL OF THEM WERE TALKING LIKE I WAS NOT PART OF THE GROUP. THE GUY IN FRANCE WAS NOT HAPPY TO KNOW THAT"

 

"AND?"

 

"HE SAID "TELL ME ALL WHAT'S HAPPENNING OVER THERE" SO I DID. I TOLD HIM THAT THE GIRL I SUPPOSSED WAS THE DIRECTOR WAS BOSSY, DIDN'T LISTEN TO SUGGESTIONS, MADE THREE TO FOUR HOURS REHEARSALS WITHOUT BREAKS, AND I TOLD HIM SHE WAS VERY RUDE AND AGRESSIVE TO TELL ME NOT TO INTEFERE WITH HER WORK, AND HE SAID "NO WAY???". THEN I TOLD HIM THAT ALL DECISIONS WERE SUPPOSSED TO BE TAKEN BY HIM, AND HE SAID "WHO TOLD YOU THAT???", WELL, EVERYONE, SO HE TOLD ME "DECISIONS ARE MADE BY ALL THE GROUP. NOBODY LEADS, IT'S A DEMOCRACY". I PREFFERED NOT TO TELL HIM THE OTHER DAY THE GIRL THAT I SUPPOSSED WAS THE DIRECTOR CLEARLY SAID "THERE'S NO DEMOCRACY HERE!!!!!!!"

 

"SO HE WAS... SURPRISED"

 

 

 

"EACH TRUTH I TOLD HIM MADE HIM DOWN, AND MORE DOWN. I TOLD HIM THAT I HAD A LOT OF IDEAS TO MAKE THE GROUP WORK BETTER BUT NOBODY LISTENED TO ME. AND THAT NOBODY HAD READ THE PLAY, SO I TOLD THE GIRL I SUPPOSSED WAS THE DIRECTOR TO GIVE THE PLAY TO THE OTHERS AND SHE DIDN'T AND ANYTIME I ASKED IF SOMEONE HAD READ THE PLAY THEY WERE LIKE "DON'T BOTHER, PLEASE" AND THIS GUY FROM FRANCE TOLD ME "YOU'RE BULLSHITTING ME???"... I SAID "I WISH" AND ADDED "LOOK, THESE GUYS LOOK AT YOU AS A GOD AND THINK YOU'RE GONNA THROW THEM A THUNDERBOLT IN THE HEAD" AND HE SAID "SO IT SEEM IT'S GONNA HAPPEN". IN THE END HE TOLD ME HE WOULD TALK SERIOUSLY WITH EACH AND ALL OF THE MEMBERS OF THE GROUP IN CHILE. HE WASN'T HAPPY, I TOLD YOU THAT"

 

"SO THE PLAY CAN BE MADE"

 

"YES. BUT THIS WAS A HUGE STEP. AND WE SAID... ONE STEP AT A TIME"

 

"YEAH, IT'S BETTER THAT WAY"

 

GIFTS FROM SANTA

 

"MIKE, IT'S BEEN AGES SINCE I DON'T WATCH GLEE"

 

"LIKE YOU GOT BORED OF IT"

 

"YEAH, FIRST SEASONS WERE AWEEESOOOOME. AND NOW. NOT"

 

"SO WHICH GIFTS YOU RECEIVED FROM SANTA?"

 

GUCCI GUILTY

90 ML BOTTLE, SHOWER GEL AND AFTER SHAVE

AND A 5 ML CONCENTRATED SAMPLE

MY LITTLE PONY FASHION DESIGN SET

RARITY, VOGUE EDITOR, AND KARL LAGERFELD

VOYAGER TAROT

THIS IS A PICTURE I TOOK BY MISTAKE

LOOKS GOOD AS AN ABSTRACT WORK

ART NOUVEAU TAROT

HOUSEWIVES TAROT

GAY TAROT

MICHELANGELO TAROT

CK ONE SHOCK 100 ML

"WELL, I EXPECTED MORE GIFTS BUT MY BROTHER GOT A PANIC ATTACK AND DECIDED NOT TO COME AND MY SISTER DIDN'T EITHER, AS SHE IS ALL THE TIME WITH THE BABY"

 

"OH... I SEE"

 

"YOU KNOW? THE GAY TAROT IS SO NORMAL. BUT THE MICHELANGELO TAROT IS FULL OF MEN NAKED OVER EACH OTHER..."

 

"WELL... IT'S MICHELANGELO, WHAT DID YOU EXPECT?"

 

"NOT THAT. IT'S WAY GAYER THAN THE GAY TAROT. IT'S JUST... SOFT PORN. THE SAME WITH THE ART NOUVEAU TAROT, BUT WITH GIRLS. LIKE THE GIRLS SHOWING OFF A LOT OF SKIN AND TOUCHING EACH OTHER AND KISSING. IS THAT WHY YOU TOLD ME TO BUY IT???"

 

"NO, I DIDN'T SEE ALL THE CARDS.... BEFORE"

 

"WELL. AND I TOOK OUT MY TOYS. I PUT THEM IN A BOOKSHELF. I DECIDED THAT BECAUSE OF MY LITTLE PONIES. I THOUGHT "WHY HIDE THEM?"

 

"YOU HIDED THEM CAUSE YOU HAVE A NEPHEW THAT WAS KICKED OUT FROM SCHOOL IN YEAR THREE FOR BAD BEHAVIOUR, AND HE DESTROYED SOME OF YOUR TOYS"

 

"YES. BUT I WON'T LET THAT HAPPEN AGAIN"

 

"HOW???"

 

"I'LL MAKE HOSTILE NEGOCIATIONS WITH HIS MOM. I HAVE NO OTHER CHOICE, SHE DOESN'T UNDERSTAND SPANISH"

 

"AH.. OH... I SEE"

 

"IT'S NOT JUST HOW MUCH THOSE TOYS COSTED. IT'S ABOUT A LOT OF THEM AREN'T MADE ANYMORE. YOU KNOW? THERE ARE THINGS MONEY CAN'T BUY"

 

"I LOVE YOU"