DATING RULE Nª1 FOR BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE!!!!

"SO WHO WAS YOUR MAKER?" I ASKED.

"SOMEONE I HAD A ONE NIGHT THING WITH. WANTED MY CELL NUMBER BUT WOULD NOT GIVE HIS OR HERS"

"SO YOU WON'T TELL ME IF IT WAS A BOY OR A GIRL?"

"NO" SAID THE CUB "HE WAS A GUY. BUT HAD THE NAME OF A GIRL. GUESS HIS PARENTS THOUGHT IT WAS A UNISEX NAME. MAYBE THEY WERE IN CALVIN KLEIN MOOD. RESULT: HE DID BEHAVE LIKE A GIRL!!!"

"HOW'S THAT???"

"IT WAS LIKE... HOW OLD YOU THINK I AM? AND I SAID OVER 30 AND HE WANTED TO RUN AWAY. THINGS LIKE THAT. HE WAS NOT A DRAMA QUEEN, HE WAS A DIVA"

"I..."

"I JUST BIT HIS NECK AT SOME POINT. THAT WORKED FOR ME. SO I TOLD HIM TO BITE MINE. BUT HE DENIED. I THOUGHT IT WAS CAUSE PSICHOLOGICALLY WAS A GIRL, BUT, GUESS WHAT? I WAS WRONG!!! HE WOULDN'T BITE ME CAUSE HE/SHE KNEW HE WAS A VAMPIRE. IT WAS NOT SHOWN IN HIS DIVA BEHAVIOUR, BUT IN OTHER... BEHAVIOUR. NOW I KNOW ABOUT THAT"

"HE CALLED YOU BACK?"

"NEVER"

"THE HELL IN CHILE EVEN MAKERS ARE LIKE THE ASS!!!" I SAID.

"GUESS I BIT HIM FOR ACCIDENT"

"ACCIDENT???"

"SO MAYBE HE THOUGHT HAD NO RESPONSABILITY OVER THE NEW VAMPE HE MADE... ME!"

"SEEMS TO ME ALL CHILEAN MEN ARE MOTHERFUCKERS"

"SEEMS TO ME I TOLD YOU NO CHILEAN MAN IS GOOD ENOUGH BOYFRIEND MATERIAL" SAID THE CUB.

"NEVER CALLED BACK!!! YOU???"

"THAT'S NOT A MAKER. IT HAPPENNED BY ACCIDENT. GUESS THE MAKER HAS TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT THE MATTER BEFORE DOING THAT, OVERALL IF THEY'RE CONSIDERING THE IDEA OF GET RESPONSIBLE ABOUT IT..."

"BUT HE NEVER CALLED"

"YES, BUT CHILEANS MADE CLEAR THEY THINK MY PAINTINGS VALUE MUSHROOM AND THEY'RE GOOD LOOKING TOO"

"NOBODY THINKS YOU VALUE MUSHROOM. THAT'S WHY THEY DON'T TALK TO YOU AND YOU HAVE TO TAKE INITIATIVE"

"YEAH... WELL. YOU KNOW. THERE'S A DATING NUMBER 1 RULE FOR BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE"

"WAS THAT NOT THE """I.E.""" THING?

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I.E. :

WORLDWIDE DEFINITION

"NOT DRUNK, NOT HIGH, NOT A SERIAL KILLER"

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"NO, MIKE..." HE SAID LAUGHING. "THE NUMBER ONE IS ANOTHER ONE."

"WHICH IS"

"ABOUT UGLY AND LAME PEOPLE".

"WHAT?" ---THE HELL!

"LOOK, MIKE. LAME UGLY PEOPLE HAVE NO OPPORTUNITY WITH A BEAUTIFUL PERSON. SO THEY DON'T HAVE NOTHING TO WIN. THAT MEANS THEY HAVE NOTHING TO LOSE. THOSE ARE THE FIRST KIND OF PEOPLE THAT GO AND AT LEAST """"TALK""" TO BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE. THE I.E. IS THE SECOND RULE. WHICH MEANS IF AN AVERAGE OR ABOVE AVERAGE PERSON TALKS TO A BEAUTIFUL PERSON, YOU MUST VERIFY FIRST IF THIS PERSON IS I.E (I.E.: NOT DRUNK, NOT HIGH, NOT A SERIAL KILLER)"

"SHIT. THE HELL YOU HAVE TO THINK THAT WAY"

"I KNOW MORE RULES... WE CAN TALK ABOUT IT IF YOU HAVE TIME"

"MAYBE I HAVE TIME BUT NO JEALOUSY TOLERANCE" I SAID.

WE LAUGHED.

"IS THERE A RULE NUMBER THREE?" I ASKED.

"FOR BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE??? YES... BUT I DON'T REMEMBER RIGHT NOW. IT'S KINDA TRICKY..."

"AH WELL..."

ANOTHER BRICK IN THE WALL.